Sunday, November 25, 2012

It Could Have Been Worse...

While some people are fearing the fact that Disney bought Lucas Films, you have to admit it could have been much worse.

What if George Lucas had bought Disney? What kind of carnage could he have inflicted on those films?

Here's 10 changes I think could have happened:

1) During a light sabre battle on dirigible in "Up," Carl Fredericksen gives up his life to Muntz so Russell, the Boy Scout, can gain spiritual strength and ultimately win the fight

2) Cinderella's Castle at Disney World replaced with half-finished Death Star

3) Jar Jar Binks cameo in "Finding Nemo 2"

4) Three prequels of the "High School Musical" series will be made, needlessly showing us how these teens became the annoying singers they are

5) In the new movie, The Lone Ranger survives an immense dynamite explosion by hiding in a crate that is blown a mile away

6) Bambi's mom shoots first!

7) All Disney child actors will train under the tutelage of maestro Jake Lloyd (this, however, may already be in place)

8) Enhanced explosions in "Fantasia!"

9) Planned sequel to "Song of the South" will feature stereotypical character voices and an extended opening scroll explaining the socio-economic landscape of the time period

10) In the sequel, we will find "The Lady" and "The Tramp" are actually brother and sister, giving the "spaghetti kiss" in the original movie a weird vibe during re-viewings

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